the welcome
Welcome to my blog, inside you'll find a little bit of everything. I made this blog a secret, and only a handful of people know of it. I like to make art, write stories with other people aka roleplaying, listen to music such as what you'll hear on my player below. Inside this blog you'll find: dreams that bother me, hopes for the future, current problems, other rants, maybe some poems, snippets of what I like to write, and general everyday stuff.


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the about
Name:: Jen
Gender:: Female
Age:: 25
DOB:: January 31, 1984
Location:: Cincinnati, Ohio
Status:: Happily Taken.


MusicPlaylist
Music Playlist at MixPod.com

the affiliates

the archive
March 2008
June 2008
October 2008
November 2008
January 2009
March 2009
April 2009
August 2009

credit
sbislove.com
sbislove.com
sbislove.com
Trick Or Treating
Sunday, November 02, 2008 @ 1:16 AM
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I went Trick or Treating with Rene, my mom and my 2 year old Godson; Ayden. Rene had me take him up to a house, one of the first ones.. to get a piece of candy for him. We had instructed him how to do it and the first house he ran up to and dropped his bag in his excitement to yell 'Trick Treat! Hi, Hi!!!"

I carried him up the walk way and he was struggling, crying and beginning to scream that he was scared. I looked over at Rene and she told me to go ahead and take him, he'd be okay. But I pressed my fingers to his chest and his heart was beating like crazy and when we got back and I put him in his stroller.. he was shaking. It was really breaking my heart and I told her he was shaking.. and she said he'd be fine.

I said, "Rene.. he's scared to death, he's only two years old." And her response was.. "And if we leave now, what about when he's three.. or five.. or eight?! He'll be scared then, too."

It really hurt my feelings.. It's like she was implying I didn't know what the hell I was talking about. I felt like she was taking him out for aesthetic purposes. With an, 'oh look how cute my 2 year old, dressed up like batman. Let's see how much candy we can get!'

It made me sick, it made me angry.. I would never put my baby through it if he was terrified like that. She made me feel like I'd be a bad mother.. she made me feel like the scorn in her eyes was saying... "You don't know what the fuck you're talking about, you don't have any children." Am I going to be a bad mom if I don't force my children to go out for Halloween if they are absolutely scared shitless? It hurt me to see that baby crying, shaking and his heart beating that wildly.. all for the sake of some stupid candy and costumes. It made me sick to witness it.